Between 9:55 and 10:15 this morning, we had received no fewer than three phone calls reminding us to vote. Being in an area with two hotly contested (and, in some cases, nationally watched) races, the phone calls have been insane this year. I've gotten calls from the candidates, calls from their colleagues, calls from President Bush, calls from soldiers, many calls from relatives of 9/11 victims, and calls from random people who happen to be part of some committee with lots of phone lines and lots of time. Heck, I even got a phone call from the local baptist church reminding me of some special series they have going on. That had nothing to do with the elections, but still... I can't believe these calls even work. When I press play on the answering machine and hear "Hi, I'm George Allen" or "I'm placing this important call to tell you about the dangers of Thelma Drake", the delete button gets hit before they get to say anything else. If I happen to get duped into picking up the phone, I don't stay on the line to be polite to a recorded message. Besides, it's not like these messages give you any useful information. I can sum up this year's races like this:

"My opponent has proven time and time again that he favors raising taxes"
"I don't favor raising taxes. Look at my opponent's record. He's the one you really have to worry about raising taxes, especially if you're poor and middle class"
"My record actually proves that I support the poor and middle class. My opponent is the one who's record shows he only cares about the wealthy."
"My opponent says my voting record proves my allegiance to the wealthy, but I'm not the one who voted to hurt families by raising gas taxes when we were paying almost $3 a gallon"
"My opponent says I'm eager to hurt families by raising the gas tax, but that's simply not true. I have several plans to help our families. My opponent wants you to believe he'll help families, but once you get him into office, he'll vote to take more money out of your pockets."
"I have no plans to raise taxes. That's my opponent. I can prove it."
"I have no plans to raise taxes. That's my opponent. I can prove it."

I left out some spats about who voted to deny our soliders body armor, who voted themselves a pay raise while voting against extra funding for (take your pick), and who rolls over every morning and gives George Bush a good morning kiss, but that's pretty much the gist.
     The latest polls I've seen have shown both races around 50/50. It's gotten so bad that when a poll shows a candidate has pulled to a 53% to 47% lead, their campaign starts practically throwing a victory party. I grew up watching the races of Reagan/Mondale and Bush/Dukakis. Whether or not you approve of how they did their job, at election time, there was clearly one candidate that the majority of the American people believed in and wanted as a leader. But, pretty much every election I can remember since I became of voting age has been like this. It says to me that there's really no candidate in the past 9 years that has managed to effectively prove that he/she is worthy to be elected into office. If you're an elected official or candidate for elected office, there's a good chance we can't stand you. In fact, we're disgusted by you. The only reason we go out and vote is because we feel that exercising that right is imperative to our democracy. We don't like you and we don't want you representing us. The reason we punch that hole next to your name is because we don't like our other options either, and something tells us that if there's any chance that one of you may not completely screw us over, it may be you. I saw an ad the other day that said that we should vote for issues and not personalities, but experience has proven that the issues we vote on don't really mean anything once they actually get to Washington and start collecting the paychecks, so I don't see where that really helps.
     I'm a registered independent because I refuse to associate myself with either nauseating party. In fact, my plans today are to vote for a republican in one race and a democrat in the other.
     And, oh my gosh, if I have to hear one more democratic candidate say "We need change. I represent change. Vote for me if you want change." I'm going to throw up. As a country, we may not be in love with George Bush, but if you want us to vote for you, you need a little something more than, "Vote for me. I'm different." OK, what are you going to do that's different? "We'll make things better." How will you make things better? "By not doing things the way they do them." What does that mean? "We'll do things differently" Can you tell me about any plans or even just one specific piece of information to tell me how you're going to improve things? [insert cricket sounds here.] "Um...a vote for me means change."
    So, in a minute here I'm going to head out to the polls, dodge all the campaign workers who think that they can change people's minds by handing them a sticker. ("I was going to vote for George Allen, but he didn't bother giving me a sticker. That's it. Jim Webb all the way.") and cast my vote for the two lesser of four evils.